Calming Crohns

Roses are red, violets are blue – romance is wonderful and so are you

As Valentine’s Day draws to a close and you are busy smelling the roses and devouring another of those little heart shaped chocolates in red foil, know that, whilst it is wonderful to have received love tokens from another, you don’t need such endorsement to feel worthy. You have everything you need within yourself, the red roses, the chocolates, the balloons, the effervescence of that champagne and so much more.

So many of us spend our lives seeking approval from others to feel good about ourselves

Society teaches us to think that we must gain approval from others for who we are and what we do. I am the first to agree that loving another and being loved back is one of the most wonderful experiences of our lives and something most of us strive for and cherish. What is less wonderful is that we are so often encouraged to look outside of ourselves as a substitute for what we should be looking for within our own hearts. Very often, the person you are looking for is the person who is looking.

Look in the mirror and tell yourself how loved you are

Some might say that that it is selfish and egotistical to practice self love. Many spiritual teachers and self help gurus advise that until you love yourself, you are not capable of truly giving or receiving love.  In the words of the great Sufi poet, Rumi:

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

For the remainder of this month, if you don’t already do so, I would encourage you to start to develop a practice of self love. You don’t need to send yourself flowers, or chocolates or shout from the rooftops (though why not!). Just look in the mirror after you wake up in the morning and remind yourself of the affirmations you need to hear.

Look in the mirror and tell yourself that “you are loved, loving and loveable.”

For those of you who didn’t have a mailbox overflowing with cards this morning, just you wait till next year….you’ve got 365 days worth of positive thoughts ahead of you.